Thanks Munch
by poetif
Summary: She's been invited to a New Year's Eve party by her good old pal John Munch. He's always had her best interests at heart. And he'd never sell her out or spring something or someone on her out of the blue. Right? Just a two parter. Will start with T and end up very M. Characters are Dick Wolf's. AN: She and Brian broke up sooner in this and Noah hasn't come along yet.
1. Chapter 1

She's warm, comfortable, satiated even until she opens her eyes to remarkably unfamiliar surroundings. On her stomach, she turns her head to one side revealing a small frame on the nightstand to her left. The young boy in it looks to be about five or six years old and he's posing for his little league picture.

There's something about his eyes…

Crap.

"_**Did you know about this Fin?" She asks, pulling him off to the side and away from prying ears.**_

"_**Hell no," he asserts. "I'm about as excited about this as you are."**_

_**They both watch as Munch's most recent New Year's Eve party guest shakes a few hands and smiles as he looks around the room, seemingly searching for someone.**_

_**Both of them know that that someone is her. **_

"_**I'm getting the hell out of here," she tells Fin. "Make whatever excuse you can for me okay?"**_

"_**You got sick all of a sudden," he says with a smirk.**_

"_**Sounds good to me," she responds. "See you in a couple of days."**_

"_**You okay?"**_

"_**I will be," she answers. "And thanks."**_

_**She picks up the hem of her long navy blue satin dress and prays she doesn't break a heel trying to run out of there. Two minutes after stopping at the coat check room, she's rushing across the parking lot of the hotel to her car.**_

It dawns on her that the shower going on the other side of the bathroom door is what woke her. She's always been a light sleeper. The way she figures it, she has about five to ten minutes to find her clothes, put them on and pull a Houdini.

Olivia ignores the mess as she makes haste. Her panties are near the foot of the bed on the floor, ripped and useless. Her bra is near the doorway. The dress is in the hallway on the floor not far from his pants. And after shimmying into it again, she locates her shoes about a foot apart from one another near an overturned planter in the living room.

The living room. That's where things started. The nearly empty bottle of Don Pilar sitting on the coffee table taunts her. It asks, _"What happened to it's never gonna happen Olivia?"_

"This is all your fault," she whispers to the bottle.

She tries to block out how the pictures on the wall got the way they are. One is askew, the other has fallen onto the floor, the glass shattered. His shirt, now buttonless, isn't far. In hearing his bathroom door open behind her, she grabs her clutch off the counter, thanking God her keys are inside once she makes it to her car.

She's too old to be concerned about having to do the _'walk of shame'_ through her apartment lobby at 7am. It's doubtful she'll be the only one taking that humiliating stroll. None the less, it's no one's business but her own.

The first thing she does when she makes it inside, is make a bee line for the bedroom. She kicks off her heels, strips off the dress and heads for her own shower. Washing his scent from her body will help, but there's nothing that will scrub the previous evening's events from her mind.

"_**Olivia!"**_

_**She moves faster.**_

"_**Liv!"**_

_**He has the advantage because he's not running in a near floor length dress, wearing four inch heels as the frigid night air hits him in the face. They make it to the car simultaneously as she gets the door open.**_

"_**Liv please," he says, stopping her from closing it. **_

"_**What do you want Elliot?"**_

"_**I just wanna talk."**_

_**There's no way he stopped to get his coat from the coat check guy before chasing her. He didn't have time. It's a simple conclusion to make then, that not only did he know he'd see her, but also what her reaction would be.**_

"_**You're about three and a half years late for a conversation, so if you'll excuse me," she tells him, attempting to pull the door closed.**_

"_**Five minutes," he begs. "That's all.**_

_**She takes a deep breath, squeezing the steering wheel nearly painfully so. It's an instant kind of rage she has these days, ironic seeing as though it used to be a major problem of his. **_

"_**I'm tired, it's cold and I'm going home," she seethes. "And point of fact, I don't owe you shit."**_

_**He pauses long enough for her to think he's about to give up and let her go. Then again, acquiescing has never actually been a part of his DNA. **_

"_**You're right," he tells her. "You don't owe me a thing," he agrees. "And I don't deserve you're ear but I'm pretty sure you have some shit you'd like to get off your chest."**_

_**It really sucks right now that he has a point. Of course Olivia has some words for him, none of them good. **_

"_**Fine Elliot," she says. "Get in."**_

_**He rushes around to the passenger side door, in case she changes her mind or decides to run him over instead.**_

_**Olivia starts the car then sits for a few seconds. She has yet to look him in the eyes and as she does so, it dawns on her that it really has been over three years since last she saw him.**_

The shower makes her feel better, rejuvenated. But whatever else she does in life, drinking tequila will not be one of them. That stuff is liquid evil as far she's concerned and the pounding headache and nausea cosign that opinion. Things may have turned out differently if she'd eaten something besides a couple of hors d'oeuvres at John's party.

Perhaps the alcohol would've metabolized just a bit slower in her system. She wasn't drunk but her inhibitions were nonexistent and her normal filters and boundaries were shot to hell.

After her shower she opens her medicine cabinet for some Excedrin. She enters her bedroom and chooses a comfortable pair of leggings and oversized sweatshirt before heading for her kitchen.

Olivia read somewhere that the best cure for a hangover is not some horrible concoction with tabasco sauce, greasy food, coffee and God forbid the "hair of the dog" get anywhere near her lips. She'd likely throw up at the smell. Nope, the cure she found is ridiculously delicious and not at all nutritious. A banana shake.

The horrible headache she has is why she usually sticks to wine and also why she usually has the sense to eat something beforehand. Hangovers absolutely suck. Especially when they're attached to a night of sex with a regrettable lover.

"_**It's your five minutes," she begins, putting the car into gear. "So where to?"**_

_**Her face is stoic and her voice is emotionless as she turns away from him, looking at the windshield once more.**_

"_**Uh my…my place," he says. "It isn't too far away."**_

_**She's not going to ask how that could be, especially when last she checked, his ass lived in Queens with his wife of thirty years and their five children. Elliot gives her the directions to an apartment near Union Square Park. **_

_**Fifteen minutes later they arrive at a ten story building. They are silent on the ride up but she can feel his eyes while hers stay glued to the hexagonal patterns of the elevator floor. Olivia follows him out when the doors open. **_

_**A few feet down the hall they stop at apartment 5640. Elliot pulls the keys from his pocket, opening the door for them. Once inside he removes his overcoat, scarf and jacket to hang in a nearby closet. As he's ditching his tie, Olivia takes the time to give the place the once over.**_

_**A small kitchen is to their left. It has slate countertops, oak cabinetry and two armless barstools that line the breakfast bar.**_

_**The living room is to their right. It has a flat screen television across from a brown tufted leather sofa. A large area burgundy and cream patterned area rug is splayed beneath a large square coffee table with storage drawers beneath. **_

_**A balcony can be seen beyond the large window as tan colored drapes are open to the night sky.**_

_**She can see a bathroom directly down the hall in front of her and what she images are doors to two other bedrooms on either side. There are two decorative black and white framed photo prints on either side of the entry to the hallway. They depict various parts of the city in different seasons. **_

_**It doesn't look like he just moved here. The place looks lived in, comfortable. He's been here for a while. She doesn't know what to make of it and doesn't plan on trying. **_

_**Olivia eyes the large wall clock above the sofa before looking at him. She hasn't bothered removing her coat or moving away from the door. **_

"_**Your five minutes start now."**_

_**He exhales like he's the most tired he's ever been in his life. **_

"_**You want a drink?" He asks, entering the kitchen.**_

_**She watches as he grabs two small glasses from a cabinet above the microwave and a bottle of amber liquid from another near the stainless steel fridge. He pauses to keep the finger paints being held there with a magnet from slipping. **_

"_**No Elliot," she answers. "And you have four minutes left," she adds, crossing her arms over her chest. "So if I were you, I'd start talking."**_

_**He pours himself a shot, knocks it back and sits the glass back forcefully against the dark surface.**_

"_**Okay," he says. "Okay," he repeats with less attitude. "In a nutshell the last three years of my life went something like this," he begins.**_

_**He pours another shot, skulls it again, and tries for an explanation.**_

"_**I got cleared after Jenna Fox's shooting but my name was shit with the NYPD after that and they let me know it, so I retired," he starts. "It took a year and a half of actually spending time with Kathy and communicating in my marriage to realize we had become two different people that are happier apart than we were together," he continues, taking a breath. **_

_**He walks past her into the living room, taking the bottle with him and sits on the sofa. After one last shot he places the glass and bottle on the table. **_

"_**My other kids are pretty much adults so they see me when their schedules allow it," he goes on. "And Eli comes here every other week and alternating holidays. It's working."**_

_**She shifts her feet at the door but doesn't say a word in reply.**_

"_**But that's not what you came to hear is it?"**_

"_**No," she admits. "It's not."**_

As she moves to the sofa with her glass of banana shake and a straw, she tries not to be pissed at Munch for setting her up. __Cragen, Fin _and_ Munch watched her for weeks after he put in his papers. They saw how hurt she was, how fragile she became despite her attempts at a strong façade. She knows Fin overheard more than one attempt at trying to reach him. Then the two newbies showed up and she had the displeasure of trying to hide her pain from strangers.

"Screw him," she says to herself.

It's a new year and all she wants to do is lounge around in her comfortable clothes, sip on her hangover shake and watch some mindless television. It's what she should've done last night but no, she let Amaro talk her into joining the rest of the squad at Munch's New Year's Eve party.

After the hell that's been the last seven months of her life, she thought she could use some champagne and laughter with friends. Between Cragen and Munch's exits and her breakup with Brian a month ago, she could use a little levity. She just hates that Munch decided for her, that she needed Elliot back in her life too.

"_**I got every message you left," he acknowledges. "I've listened to them a thousand times," he admits. **_

"_**Then why…**_

_**She hates sounding so damned weak, so in need of the reason he couldn't be bothered to respond to any of them.**_

"_**I…I don't know."**_

"_**You don't know?" She asks in a stronger voice. "That's bullshit!"**_

"_**Okay I do know," he says, raising his voice with hers. "But I couldn't deal with it along with everything else!"**_

"_**What does that even mean Elliot? You asked for five minutes and I gave it to you thinking you'd tell me why a twelve your partnership ended in silence!"**_

_**He scrubs his hands down his face, a frustrated gesture she's seen more times than she can count.**_

"_**I wanted to talk to you, see you, tell you face to face that I was retiring," he tells her, now calm. "But just like you couldn't tell me when you wanted another partner, I couldn't tell you I was leaving," he explains. "Knowing that I wasn't coming back."**_

"_**Why not?"**_

"_**Oh come on Liv," he says, getting off the sofa to approach her. "The same old 'why not' that's been between us for years," he adds. "It got too damned complicated."**_

_**Now she wants a drink.**_

_**She takes it upon herself to enter his kitchen, gets her own shot glass and stalks over to the sofa before snatching up the bottle. It's tequila. She never drinks it and for good reason but tonight is…it's too much.**_

_**She tosses back one shot to his surprise, then another before slamming the bottle back onto the table. His five minutes are up now so it's her turn.**_

"_**You know we've never talked about what the hell that means," she starts. "So why don't we do that now huh?"**_

"_**Liv…**_

"_**No Elliot, let's communicate," she says, stretching out the last word. "Apparently you've learned to do that since last I saw you, so we should give it a try," she adds.**_

"_**Olivia…**_

"_**Shut up," she seethes, pouring and knocking back another shot, evening up the drink tally. "It's my turn."**_

_**He eyes her like she's a stranger, and after everything she's gone through during the years in between seeing him, she may as well be.**_

"_**We were connected to the point where we could finish each other's sentences," she tells him. "You and I could anticipate one another's next step in any investigation," she continues. "I shared everything with you…gave everything that the perimeters of this job and your marriage allowed," she adds, pointing a finger at him. **_

_**Between the three tequila shots and the anger, the walls have fallen down and she's coming unglued.**_

"_**You had more of me than any m…anyone ever has Elliot," she confesses with a near misstep. "Do you have any idea how hard it was to trust someone after you left, the way you left? **_

"_**I'm sorry," he manages, standing again.**_

"_**Screw your sorry," she tells him, turning on her heels to leave. **_

"_**I thought we were gonna communicate," he says to her back, drawing her in again. "Looks to me like you're on the run."**_

"_**I listened to your piss poor explanation Elliot," turning to face him again. "I'm done here."**_

_**He beats her to the door and blocks her exit.**_

"_**Well I'm not," he says. "You wanted to discuss complicated so let's freakin' discuss it," he adds. **_

_**He wants to talk, she'll talk. She takes her coat off, throwing it over a bar stool and digs in, preparing for the last fight she ever wants to have with this son of a bitch.**_

"_**Go," she says, crossing her arms over her chest again.**_

"_**I hesitated with you, I worried over you and I-**_

"_**You what?" She asks, impatiently.**_

"_**I was tempted…by you," he admits. "When you were trying to fix me up after I got popped by that lesbian bouncer and I wouldn't hold still-**_

"_**Yeah, I remember," she acknowledges. "But what does that have to do with-**_

"_**You were standing very close, in between my legs as I sat on the end of my desk," he reminds her. "I didn't want you to keep touching me."**_

_**She watches him visibly swallow, eying the floor momentarily before meeting her expression once again.**_

"_**But I…did," he confesses. "You said you gave me all that my marriage and the NYPD allowed Liv and being the selfish bastard that I am, I still wanted more," he says. "It can't get more complicated than that."**_

_**She blinks several times as she shakes her head in disbelief. She walks halfway towards his sofa and then back to him again, standing with one hand on her hip, the other over her mouth.**_

"_**I don't," she tries. "What the hell am I supposed to say to that?" She asks. "We affected each other Elliot," she manages. "And even if you thought you couldn't say any of that to my face, you could've tried to say…something," she adds, getting angry all over again. **_

_**Her anger is bubbling over and this time she will not try to reign in back in.**_

"_**What about have a nice life Liv, thanks for the memories, thanks for having my back or saving my ass and my career on a repeated basis," she continues. "What about thanks for putting your pension on the line for my ass more than once!"**_

"_**I put up my house for you!"**_

"_**I didn't ask you to!" She screams. "I've never asked you for a damned thing!"**_

"_**And you're a coward for it!"**_

_**It's a good thing the neighbors are probably out or making their own noise because surely their screaming can be heard from there to the Empire State building.**_

"_**Excuse me?"**_

"_**You heard me," he tells her. "You fought harder for my marriage than I did Olivia," he accuses. "You watched out for my kids, took up for me at work and never asked for freakin' thing!"**_

"_**Most people would be grateful!"**_

"_**I would if I didn't feel so damned guilty for it," he tells her. "You did all that at the expense of a life and a family of your own," he adds, calming.**_

_**She turns from him then, hiding the emotion starting to build, thickening her throat all the sudden.**_

"_**Don't you dare," she rasps. "It's called being a good partner."**_

"_**How many relationships did you let me or the job get in the way of? He asks. "How many times did me calling you to a crime scene interrupt a night out?" **_

Olivia was doing just fine before Munch decided to interfere in her life. She's working past what happened with William Lewis with Dr. Lindstrom. She made sergeant and is supervising SVU now and besides the fact that things didn't work out, she'd started dating again.

The last thing she needed was Elliot showing up as a reminder of her old life and the woman she used to be. Sometimes she wishes for those simpler times, wishes she could be that person again. But, she knows that that Olivia Benson is long gone and she has to deal with what is.

The walk down memory lane, the feelings it stirred and the…results, are all things she didn't need to start her new year with. If last night was the closure she used to long for, then she'll deal with _how_ she got it if she never sees him again.

The only problem with that logic is her memory, and that fact that she still has one. Even after the hickeys fade, the bruises disappear from her thighs and the love bites fade away from other parts of her anatomy, his touch, his voice in whispers, won't soon leave her.

Damn him.


	2. Chapter 2

"_**You know it's true Liv," he continues. "And I'm sorry I broke your trust, but each of us needed to figure out our lives without the influence of the other."**_

"_**Who are you to have decided that for me?" She asks, turning and advancing on him abruptly. "Do you have any idea what you put me through?**_

_**She slaps him and calls it a favor. It could've been a right hook or that infamous elbow of hers. After rethinking it she feels he's due more, taking another swing. He catches her forearm in mid strike. When she tries with the left he repeats the same. **_

"_**Don't you touch me," he seethes, holding both arms in his hands. **_

"_**Really?" She asks with sarcasm. "I thought you wanted my hands on you," she taunts.**_

_**He stands with his chest heaving, blue eyes that have darkened to a near black fixated on the ire of her browns.**_

"_**Don't," he says through clenched teeth.**_

"_**So…you don't want me anymore Elliot," she continues, mocking him. "I no longer…tempt you?"**_

_**She sees his eyes dart down to her lips for the tiniest of seconds but she knows she has him none the less.**_

"_**Now who's the coward?" **_

_**Elliot can no longer take her ridiculing. He accepts her challenge by pulling her against him, crashing his lips against hers. She resists at first, pulling back initially, but he chases. The kiss is frenzied, animalistic.**_

_**He releases her when he realizes she's not trying to get away, but instead trying to get closer. The second he does, Olivia's arms are around his neck, removing the distance between them and kissing him back deeply, passionately. **_

_**After opening her mouth to him she doesn't know whether it's his tequila she tastes or her own. He moves his lips from her mouth to her neck, grazing the skin with his teeth before soothing it with his tongue. **_

_**She feels his hands roaming her back, feeling for the clasp.**_

"_**Side," she instructs him. **_

_**He pulls back momentarily, looking into her eyes. When he locates the zipper, he moves it down slowly, appreciating each inch of flesh revealed as he goes. But she doesn't want the wait, she wants the urgency. A slow pace gives her time to think and that's the last thing she wants to do.**_

_**She rips his shirt open and the buttons fly out all over the floor. Her lips are on his again shortly thereafter, reminding him of their previous pace. Olivia untucks his tank from his pants, smoothing it up his body before he decides to yank it up and off himself.**_

"_**I want you," he manages in between kisses.**_

"_**No shit," she says, loosening his belt. **_

_**Olivia steps out of her shoes, as he walks her backwards with his mouth still attached to her throat. First they hit a fern, knocking the plant over but it doesn't stop them. Then they hit the wall with the back of her head, causing one of the framed shots of the city to hit the floor and break.**_

"_**Sorry," he says.**_

_**Olivia doesn't give a damn, doesn't stop. She kisses him again, delving into his mouth and biting his bottom lip. **_

"_**Ow," he says, pausing to look at her.**_

"_**Now we're even," she tells him.**_

_**He grabs a fistful of her hair, slightly tugging her head to sink his teeth on her neck before soothing it with his tongue. She would protest if it hadn't turned her on even more. **_

_**Elliot ditches his shoes and pants as they continue down the hall. He all but rips the dress from her body along the way. They pause again when they reach his bedroom as he reaches for the clasp of her bra. Olivia tosses it aside as he moves his hands down her back and over her ass before grasping the back of her thighs. **_

_**Her legs are wrapped around his waist as he carries her to the bed. She's deposited, unceremoniously so, on the top of the covers as he climbs over her, landing between her thighs. **_

_**Olivia's allowing him to kiss her slowly as she moves her hands down his sides, sliding them into his black boxer briefs so she can push them down his legs. He quickly kicks them off before realigning himself with her. **_

_**Elliot kisses his way from her mouth to her collar bone before going lower, pausing to lick between her breasts. He moves to his right, capturing one toffee colored bud into his mouth, suckling it as she begins to moan.**_

_**He scrapes his teeth over it causing her to hiss before repeatedly circling it with his warm tongue. Reflexively she drags her fingernails across his back causing the same reaction.**_

_**Two can play this game. The verbal altercations their capable of seems to have taken on a life of its own in this new form. **_

_**While his mouth is busy, his left hand wonders beneath the waist of the black lace thong she chose for the night. When he moves pass the small patch of curls, she brings her right leg up further, bending it at the knee to encourage him. **_

_**He parts her, rubbing his rough fingers against the most intimate of folds. Minutes later he's covering her mouth again, swallowing the gasp of her first orgasm. They are skin to skin, as he waits for her to come back to herself.**_

"_**Do you miss me?" He asks.**_

"_**Stop talking," she tells him, pulling him down for another kiss.**_

_**She knows Elliot, knows he doesn't appreciate her not answering him. To hell with him, now he knows how it feels. But he can be vindictive too so he takes advantage of their positions and states of dress, rubbing his length against her damp panties. **_

_**She hates when she's not the one doing the teasing.**_

_**Olivia flips them so that she's now on top. She rubs hardened nipples against what little hair he has on his chest causing him to groan. But the sweet friction is turning her on just as much so she employs a different tactic, moving her hand lower to wrap around him. **_

_**Elliot allows her to stroke him for all of two seconds before ripping away her panties.**_

"_**Son of a bitch," she says. "That was La Perla you ass."**_

"_**And you owe me a shirt," he responds before flipping them again. "Now we're even," he adds, mocking her.**_

_**He parts her legs wider, kneeling in front of her. Elliot teases her for a moment before languidly slipping inside. When she grabs her thighs to pull her closer, he inevitably sinks deeper, finding the perfect spot. **_

_**She's never been a screamer but the urge to do so has never hit her as hard as it is at the moment and unfortunately for her, he knows it. He leans over her, planting his hands on either side of her head before dipping into her mouth.**_

_**Elliot punishes that site, over and over again with each thrust. A minute later, she can't help but be vocal about what he's doing to her. Her moans, and screams only spur him on and he quickens the pace. **_

_**For all her challenging and goading, she's the one that's lost her composure and doesn't feel the least bit regretful about it. She feels it building, her orgasm, and it will not be a weak one.**_

_**A short time later it hits full force, causing her to arch her back off the bed and spasm beneath him. Elliot takes the opportunity to slow down while she doesn't have the energy to change his mind.**_

"_**I miss you," he whispers near her ear.**_

_**He takes his time now, sweetly kissing her shoulder, each eyelid, then tip of her nose. When he returns to her lips it's no longer frenzied. He parts them tenderly with his own before sliding his tongue alongside hers. **_

"_**You're so beautiful," he mutters as he sweetly sweeps her hair behind her ear. **_

_**She's still pissed at him and hates this gentle side, this refusal to just…screw each other's brains out without feeling the attachment. There were times when she'd say the most hateful things to him and he'd simply walk away or ignore it without firing back.**_

_**That's the part of him she's experiencing right now. His pace is leisurely, caressing the soft skin of her cheek while taking in the satisfied expression on her face. There's no way she'll be able to look at him the same after this, nor he her.**_

_**Elliot reaches for her hands and intertwines their fingers as she rides out her third orgasm, while he's finding his first. It renders her speechless as he collapses to the side of her and he pulls Olivia to him, torsos touching.**_

_**His forehead is against hers while both their eyes are closed. From an outsider's point of view, the places where Elliot starts and she ends is undistinguishable. They are a bundle of arms and legs, twisted up in one another. Olivia can feel the edges of slumber incessantly tugging at her mind.**_

_**She's falling asleep with the sensation of his fingertips up and down her spine and his breaths whispering against her lips.**_

"_**Be angry with me Liv, just don't hate me," he tells her. "I couldn't take that."**_

_**It's the last thing she remembers before slipping into darkness.**_

Her only saving grace is that they didn't exchange numbers or addresses. So the only way he could find her is if Munch told him where she's moved to. And though he's a nosey little beanpole, he wouldn't just…

Three rhythmic knocks sound at the door.

Son of a bitch.

She hopes it's anyone other than who she _knows_ it is. Let it be a little girl selling Girl Scout cookies, she thinks. Let it be Munch trying to apologize for forcing Elliot back into her life or hell, maybe even a Jehovah's Witness asking if she's heard the "good news".

The knocking repeats, harder this time.

Olivia exhales roughly before deciding that he'd likely kick the door in if she tried to pretend she wasn't home. She opens it to find a very brawny, pissed off looking man standing on the other side of her threshold. If clothes really reflect a person's mood, then the fact that he's dressed in black jeans, boots, and leather jacket can't be good.

"How the hell do you know where I live?"

"The same way I knew where you'd be last night," he replies. "Munch."

She wonders if she can plead temporary insanity if she drove to his loft and strangled him with her bare hands.

"You gonna invite me in?"

Olivia turns to resume her post on the sofa and he follows her inside. She curls up in one corner, pulling her knees against her chest. Grabbing the remote, she turns the volume down on a home renovation show.

"You forgot these," he says, digging into his pocket.

Elliot pulls out the sapphire and diamond earrings she realized she was missing once she'd made it to her apartment. Since there was no way in hell she was going back to his place to get them, she'd counted them as a loss. They were a gift from a past relationship anyway.

"I found them in my sheets," he adds, laying them on her coffee table. "They look kind of pricey so I thought you might want 'em back."

"Thanks."

"So," he starts, stuffing his hands in his front pockets. "Is sneaking out of bed the morning after a habit of yours or-

"Screw you Elliot," she says getting up from the sofa.

"You've already done that," he retorts.

"Get the hell out," she fumes. "We're done and you're not getting another five minutes," she adds as he follows her to the door.

When Olivia opens it, he shuts it again, caging her between it and his body. Elliot leans in so close she can feel the words that come out of his mouth.

"I think we both know our "talking" took a lot longer than that," he rasps. "So no, we're _not_ done. Not until you can tell me why you couldn't be bothered to stick around this morning."

She's not threatened by Elliot. There are no PTSD flashbacks from Lewis entering her mind and she knows he'd never physically hurt her. Besides which, she has some self-defense moves she hadn't possessed since last she saw him. And fortunately for him, Olivia doesn't see the need to employ any of them where he's concerned.

"You need to leave," she tries, avoiding his challenge.

"No," he says. "You owe me an explanation."

She pushes him away so hard he nearly hits the opposite wall.

"Well give me about three years and I'll come up with one," she smarts off, walking into the kitchen. "I promise you it'll be better than yours."

"That was the truth!" He yells, following behind as she starts a pot of coffee.

She doesn't really want any, she just needs something to do and a reason to create distance from Elliot. He's beginning to get to her.

"Lower your voice," she orders. "I have neighbors you know."

"You weren't worried about _my_ neighbors last night," he quips but lowers his voice. "First it was the screaming match and then it was…moaning and more screaming," he says, closing in on her in the small space. "But in a good way."

"Look, we both had fun," she acknowledges. "Consider it closure and leave it at that," she suggests.

"Why'd you leave this morning Liv?" He rasps, less than a foot away. "Just tell me…please."

Olivia doesn't want to, doesn't want to feel what she's feeling, and hates how one night with him has stirred up so much emotion. And despite how long it's taken, he finally told her the truth. Maybe she should try the same.

"Because," she begins. "Old habits are hard to break and I still don't…I don't like to ask anyone for anything, they have a tendency to disappoint me."

She pointedly stares at him after the comment but he stands and takes her scrutiny, knowing he deserves it.

"You're right," he admits. "And I can't apologize enough for making the decision to leave without telling you and especially for not saying goodbye," he continues. "You deserved better."

"I did…I do," she says, facing the counter and turning away from him.

"You do," he says, nearly whispering. "And you gotta know," he continues, placing a hand on her lower back. "It wasn't just sex…not for me."

It's too much and it's been too long.

"Why last night?" She asks, ignoring his comment. "Why at all?"

"Why what?"

"Why choose New Year's Eve three years later to try and explain yourself?" She asks, turning to face him again and effectively dropping his hand from her back. "You got exactly what you wanted," she tells him. "We've figured out our lives without the other's influence."

"I didn't-

"You didn't what, Elliot," she interrupts. "Realize it would take so long to get your shit together?'

He leans back against the counter, resting his hands next to him.

"No," he responds, surprising her. "I didn't. But I finally have, and it took a year after the divorce to figure out what I wanted and two months to convince John to help me."

Good old Munch. They're going to have a very long conversation about all of this. And she may even let him keep some teeth afterwards.

"Help you what?" She asks, mimicking his position at the counter.

"Apologize," he says. "And find out what chance I had to _un_complicate things between us," he adds, turning his head to gauge her reaction.

Olivia rolls her eyes and shakes her head. She's really starting to hate that word. Complicated.

"What do you want from me Elliot?"

"I want you not to hate me," he tells her.

"Fine," she says, walking past him. "I don't hate you, now you can go."

She's halfway across the living room when she feels his hand on her arm, turning her to face him.

"What do _you_ want?" Elliot asks. "Because I miss you Liv," he asserts. "I've never been so…connected to a person, not even Kathy and I need that back in my life," he tells her. "I need _you_ back in my life."

Olivia's eyes grow wide at his bold confession but she quickly recovers. She's not used to this honest and open version of her former partner. There are no assumptions, no having to draw her own conclusions.

He picks up the hands she has dangling at her sides, taking them in his, caressing his thumbs over her knuckles before stepping closer. He's quiet for a few seconds, just staring at their hands before continuing.

"I'm done disappointing you," he says, nearly whispering. "You don't have to be afraid to ask me for anything," he proposes.

Olivia looks back in forth between his eyes and can't come up with a response. When she looks down and away, he takes that to mean that she wants nothing from him. He places a chaste kiss against her forehead, releases her hands and takes a step back.

"I uh," he begins, rubbing his forehead. "I'll just go then," he says, walking past her towards the door.

Before he can get there, it's Olivia who stops him. She tugs him towards her, taking his face in her palms. There's a split second pause before she's kissing him. It's not as aggressive as it was last night because there's less anger. But, it's just as passionate.

When he opens his mouth to speak, she caresses the roof of it with her tongue and he groans in response. Olivia moves her hands from his face to his shoulders, smoothing his jacket down and onto the floor.

His hands are all over her then, finding their way beneath the over-sized sweatshirt to the soft skin of her back. It's a pleasant surprise for him that Olivia decided to forgo a bra after her morning shower.

Thirty minutes later they're naked on her sofa, covered by her throw blanket. She's lying on his chest between his legs, caressing the skin of his stomach, while Elliot has a hand threaded through her short locks.

"I told you old habits were hard to break," she says, breaking the silence. "So this is me…trying to do that," she tells him.

"Well it_ is_ a new year," he points out. "There's no better time to break a habit than today," he suggests. "Ask me Liv…whatever you want."

"Okay."

Silence reigns in the apartment, save for the low volume on the television, now playing some house flipping show.

"Two things," Olivia says after a few minutes, interrupting the quiet. "First, never use the word 'complicated' again when you're talking about us."

"Wait, there's an us?" He asks, hopefully.

"Focus Elliot," she tells him.

"Right," he says. "And second?"

Olivia raises up then, planting her arms on either side of him as she lowers her mouth to his.

"This time," she whispers against his lips. "Just…stay."

"For as long as you want me," he says, closing the distance and kissing her again.

Olivia and Elliot ring in the New Year and a new start together, having closed the door and what was, so they can enjoy what is yet to come.

Munch is apparently, a lot wiser than he seems.


End file.
